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alt.romance "FAQ" (part 1 of 3) [posted monthly]
Section - #6# Gifts

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Top Document: alt.romance "FAQ" (part 1 of 3) [posted monthly]
Previous Document: #5# Snuggling and sleeping
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See reader questions & answers on this topic! - Help others by sharing your knowledge
 From: (WONG  Peter Chih Chen)  @}-,-`--- @}-,-`---
 subject: Teddy Bears

A way to deliver your gift: I strapped the first one I gave her
into the passenger seat of my car, and I told her I was bringing
a friend to meet her but to be cautious because he's very shy
and a lot younger. So she approached the car very timidly when I
picked her up and she got confused when she couldn't see anyone
as we approached the car. When I opened the door and introduced
her, her reaction was wonderful.


 From: (Marcia Bednarcyk)  @}-,-`-- @}-,-`-- @}-,-`-- @}-,-`- @}-

Ah, holiday and birthday gifts. They're fraught with such meaning, which makes
getting the "perfect" thing at the right time so "important". I use quotes
deliberately, because we tend to blow these things up way out of proportion.

Here are my list of suggestions for gift giving. Take them as you will, they
seem to work ok for me. BTW, I'm assuming at this point you've decided that
you would like to give your SO a gift for whatever reason :-).

1. Reduce the importance of the occasion, and give up the quest for the
   "perfect" gift. This is the hardest part, I know, because you want the
   person to be delighted with the gift. Remind yourself that if s/he isn't
   delighted, it's not the end of the world. (If it is, you have more problems
   than a gift will solve.) Remember: panic makes it harder to choose a
   gift :-).

2. Start thinking about gifts early. This gives you time to think about what
   you want to get, your price range, and if you happen to see the "perfect"
   thing you can get it when you see it.

3. Here's the real work: *observe* your SO. What does s/he like that s/he
   doesn't have? What would make his/her life easier? If you're at a friend's
   house, does s/he spend the whole time playing with/admiring/gushing over
   something? Is there something that consistently catches his/her eye when
   you're shopping together? Does s/he keep mentioning a certain thing?

   This is the real secret, since it allows you to find out what s/he really
   likes. And it is hard, since it requires you to listen, observe, and
   remember without taking notes. I got into this habit early, since I have
   a few people I like to give things to who are impossible to buy for. But I
   get ideas all year long by watching and listening, and generally I do
   pretty well.

   For example, 2 years ago I saw the books of the Monty Python scripts and
   got them for a dyed in the wool Monty Python friend who I knew didn't know
   they were out. He loved them :-). And last year I was given a watch that
   I have loved for ages but never got around to getting for myself for
   various reasons.

4. Help out your SO. If they've ever lamented that you're difficult to get
   things for, drop a few hints. Mention you like something, or something
   else would be really useful. Miss Manners may frown, but in the past I
   have been so grateful for any help.

5. If you're really, really stuck, ask your SO what s/he would like. Most
   common answer is "You don't have to get me anything", which, of course,
   you don't listen to at all. Better to ask "What have been your favorite
   presents" or "What do you think of <something>?" or anything to get the
   conversational ball rolling. Hopefully you can pick up the clues there.

6. If all else fails, there's always a romantic dinner/picnic, flowers, or
   candy. Assuming your SO likes those kinds of things ;-).

What it all comes down to really is knowing your SO, what s/he likes, and
tailoring the gift within your time and budget constraints to those likes.

 From: (Meredith Howard)  @}-,-`-- @}-,-`-- @}-,-`---
 subject: Romantic Care Package

> >Hello all!
> >	I'm a college sophmore and my boyfriend and I go to separate
> >schools.  ONe of the things we do to keep the romance going is to send
> >each other romantic care packages every now and then.  The thing is,
> >I am starting to run out of ideas.  In the past we have sent each other
> >romantic music mixes, candy, stuffed animals, red ribbons for tying
> >letters togehter, flowers, even pizza on one occasion.  ANd lots of
> >cards.  If anyone has more ideas for relatively inexpensive but romantic
> >things I could send my sweety, I would very much appreciate it.  I have
> >great faith in the ability of this group's readers to come up with some
> >wonderful suggestions.  :)
> >			Thanks!  Meredith
> >

	Well, I got some awesome responses alright. I think it's only
fair that I post them for everyone to share.  I think I've got everything
everyone mailed to me, but if I forgot one please post the addition- they
were all neat.
1. Have a friend take lots of pictures of you doing fun things while you and
your SO are apart. Then, find some pictures of your SO and insert him/her
into all the ones of you having fun.
2. Make a tape of yourself talking, singing, or telling a favorite bedtime
story.  By the way, does anyone have any suggestions for good bedtime
stories? :)
3. Get access to a cool graphics program and a scanner, and make an
official certificate saying "World's Best Boyfriend/Girlfriend", with
your SO's pictureon it.
4. Make something childishly creative, using Elmer's glue and construction
5. Send a lock of your hair, esp. if it's in a plastic envelope that they
can carry in their wallet.
6. Send a lipstick imprint of your lips, lamenated, that they could keep with
7. Send the most romantic candy- hershey's kisses, and it's new complement,
hershey's hugs.
8. Take pictures of you doing really ordinary things that will make your SO
think of all the little things that are so nice about being together.  Even
stuff like brushing your teeth is good.
9.  Make a little book complete with illustrations of what you have been doing
over the past week.

	I think these were all great because they are all very personal,
and most are things that involve time and energy, but not necessarily a lot of
money.  They are also the kind of things that you would want to keep and
remember for a long time.  Thanks to everyone who contributed.

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Top Document: alt.romance "FAQ" (part 1 of 3) [posted monthly]
Previous Document: #5# Snuggling and sleeping
Next Document: #7# Flowers and their meaning

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