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alt.romance "FAQ" (part 1 of 3) [posted monthly]
Section - #4# Kissing and hugging

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Top Document: alt.romance "FAQ" (part 1 of 3) [posted monthly]
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See reader questions & answers on this topic! - Help others by sharing your knowledge
 From: jodar@girtab.usc.edu (Nicholas Jodar)  @}-,-`-- @}-,-`-- @}-,-`-- @}-,--

>Alright guys...Here's the situation.  I am not desperate, just looking for
>a variety of answers to work with on this one.  Say you take a girl out
>and you get back to her apartment and it's time to say goodnight.  What
>should you do to get the kiss started and also, under what circumstances
>would you throw a girl a nice kiss.  Just looking for some ways I haven't
>used and/or considered.  Thanks...

Well, there are many ways to do it, most dependent on your style.
You could avoid kissing altogether:  a small momento to remember
the occasion with, a nice bow with a flourish, a good handshake,
a wave goodbye, a gentle caress of her cheek.  You could make it
a neutral kiss:  throw her a kiss, kiss her hand, kiss her cheek,
kiss your finger and touch it to her lips.  And of course,
there's the KISS kiss... :-)

Tell her (if you haven't already) how much you enjoyed the
evening, and ask if she'd like to go out again.  DO NOT tell her
you're going to call her just to have something to say.  Many men
do this and it drives women nuts because the men never do call.
If you can, tentatively schedule your next date.  If you can't do
that, at least let her know you'd like to go out again.

One good way to end things is by giving her a big hug.  I don't
know of too many people that refuse a nice hug.  If you hugging
isn't up to par, practice a bit, first.  You'll find lots of
people willing to help you practice. :-)  A good hug is firmly
snug, but not crushing, requires a relaxed holding of the other
person, (like you would hold them if you were trying to comfort
them), and often includes some small movement, like rocking from
side to side.  Hugs last anywhere from one second to one minute,
depending on how the people feel.

After you give her a hug, you can look her in the face while
remaining embraced.  Stare into her eyes for a moment as you
smile.  If she pulls back, let her go, but keep smiling.  If she
doesn't, then just hold her.  If she looks down at your mouth, or
closes her eyes, this means she's expecting a kiss.  Try being as
delicate as possible...  That's usually a good way to kiss for
the first time.  The memory of it will be like a butterfly, light
and beautiful....

It's all fairly straightforward...  Anybody else have any nifty
ideas?

-Nick


 From: kika.bbs@cybernet.cse.fau.edu  @}-,-`-- @}-,-`-- @}-,-`-- @}-,-`-- @}-,-

[...]
Kissing.. what a great topic and one of my favorite pastimes.. :)
I can relate to a certain extent with your friend.  I consider
kissing to be an artform.  The more creative the kissing, the
more artistic and pleasurable to the palette. (pun intended)
Men who french kiss during the entire exchange turn me off
completely.

Slow sensual and *mutual* touching, tasting, nibbling, licking,
and variations thereof, combine to make the best kissing IMHO.
The way a man kisses, tells me a great deal about how good of
a lover he would be.  Which bring me to another point.. men
that just clamp their lips on yours and never move their lips
or change the angle of the kiss, lose out on the whole rhythm
and motion of a kiss.  It should be something dynamic and
explorative, but not explorative in the way that some jam
their tongues in your mouth as though they were searching
for fillings or something! :)


 From: bweiss@cs.arizona.edu (Beth Weiss)  @}-,-`-- @}-,-`-- @}-,-`-- @}-,-`---
 subject: First kiss: Are glasses a problem?

[...]
If she resists, is scared, or feels guilty, she's not ready to be
kissed.  If your gentle attempt to kiss her doesn't meet with shy
acceptance, then she's not ready--and you should stop.  If that
happens, tell her you understand, and ask if you can try again in a
few days or a few weeks.

>    But, what embarrassing it is, if our glasses stop my way just on
>    the critical moment....

From experience, glasses don't get in the way very much at all.  If
only one party is wearing glasses, it's hardly ever a problem.  If
they both are, kissing can still be done quite easily.

However, if you're worried about it, you might try this (and it will
give her a chance to decide if she's just a little timid or if she
wants you to stop):
   Reach over and gently take off her glasses, saying softly, "I'd
      like to kiss you"
   (optional: take off your glasses)
   Then kiss her gently

>    ps. Note that the important keyword : First Time.

IMHE, first kisses don't tend to be as passionate as those shown in
the movies--you can do it with glasses on.  If they get in the way,
one or both of you will pull back long enough to take them off.


 From: ar2j+@andrew.cmu.edu (Anthony Russell Rosania)  @}-,-`-- @}-,-`-- @}-,--

When I first kissed my first girlfriend, our glasses bumped and clicked,
we both laughed took them off, and we kissed, not picture perfect
romance, but it was a good tension breaker, we we're both alot more
relaxed that way.

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Top Document: alt.romance "FAQ" (part 1 of 3) [posted monthly]
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