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Top Document: soc.culture.jewish FAQ: Observance, Marriage, Women in Judaism (4/12) Previous Document: Question 8.7: What does clean/unclean refer to? Next Document: Question 8.9: I've heard that Orthodox men can't touch women. Is this true? See reader questions & answers on this topic! - Help others by sharing your knowledge
Answer:
The Torah teaches us, "Do not draw close to a woman when she is a
niddah; relations are forbidden [at that time]." (Leviticus 17:18).
From this, the laws relating to ritual purity and niddah are derived.
First, note that the extent to which these laws are followed depend on
the movement. These laws are followed in the more traditional
movements, and are often reinterpreted in the progressive movements
such as Reform as a mechanism of rediscovering female spirituality.
So, what is "niddah". Simply put, a woman becomes a niddah when blood
comes from her womb. She might see the flow, or she might see a stain
on her clothing. The blood must come from her womb. If she cuts her
finger, she does not become a niddah. If she finds blood on her
underclothing, and she does not know if it is from a cut or from her
womb, she needs to check with her Rabbi.
Being niddah should not be looked at as a time of negativity. The
traditional perspective is that this is when a woman's body is
renewing itself, getting ready to produce fresh ova so that she will
be able to fulfill the commandment of having children.
A woman is a niddah until she undergoes "taharah." The taharah process
involves a minimum of twelve days, most often thirteen. These are
divided into two sets of time, the first five days, and seven days of
taharah, after which she must immerse properly in a mikvah (ritual
bath).
A woman who does not go through the taharah process cannot become
tahor (the opposite state from niddah). It does not matter if she not
seen blood in ten years. No matter how long ago she last had her
period, if she has not immersed properly in the mikvah, she is still a
niddah.
First, however, to the other aspect of being niddah. Recall the Torah
verse above. It says "Do not draw close." Traditionally, this is tied
in with marital relations, and the view is that any act that could
lead a person to marital relations is forbidden. A husband and wife
are very accustomed to being physically intimate with each other, and
therefore they must take great care during the time the woman is
niddah.
While a woman is a niddah, she and her husband must relate completely
on a non-physical level. Traditionally, they do not hug or kiss each
other (or do more).
How is the niddah period, and the various time periods determined? The
first five days begin when a woman first sees her flow. She counts
from the beginning of the flow, and continues until the flow stops. If
it takes less than five days for her flow to stop, she still has to
wait until five days are over. Even if she saw blood for only one day,
she must wait five days until she can begin the seven-day taharah
process. The five days need not be complete five days. The first day
might start in the middle of the day, if she first saw her flow in the
afternoon. But whenever they began, they end on the night after the
fifth day.
If she sees blood for more than five days, the "five" days end when
she has definitely stopped seeing. Once she has stopped seeing blood,
she can begin the count of the Seven White Days. "stopped seeing
blood" means that she has stopped seeing either a flow of blood or
stains on her clothing
completely. These days begin when the woman, before sunset, takes a
shower or bath, and cleans herself thoroughly, everywhere. She then
waits a few minutes, and inserts a cloth and checks herself. If it
comes out clean, then the next day is the first day of the Seven White
Days. During this period, the woman must check herself twice a day:
when she gets up, and just before sunset. Checking is done with a
white, absolutely clean piece of cloth. Often, such cloths are
available at the local mikvah. The woman first checks the cloth very
carefully to make sure it is clean of any marks. She then places her
finger in the center of the cloth, and allows the cloth to wrap around
her fingers, and the pushes the cloth so that every surface inside her
is touched by the cloth. She removes the cloth, and checks it very
carefully. If it comes out free of any mark, no problem. If the cloth
has a mark, she looks at the color. A red or black mark means there is
still discharge of blood. White or pale yellow is not a problem.
Colors like brown, dark yellow, gold, and pink, are very problematic.
Traditional women would then bring the cloth to a competent local
Orthodox Rabbi who looks at the cloth and is able to determine whether
it is Niddah blood or not. Orthodox rabbis have special training that
allows them to make this determination.
Traditionally, during these days, the woman should wear white
underwear and uses white bed linens. Of course, any staining during
this period must be considered, as above.
When the Seven White Days are over, that night, the woman goes to the
mikvah. This is the same day of the week the Seven White Days began.
To prepare for the mikvah, after checking, the woman takes a bath,
followed by a shower, and other careful preparations. She cleans and
cuts all her nails, both finger and toe, as well as making sure there
is no food between her teeth. She cleans her ears, and every body
cavity. She removes all makeup, and combs her hair completely. Many
women take the bath at home, and do the follow-up shower at the
mikvah.
When going to the mikvah, she may not have anything between her and
the water at any part of her body. Therefore she must remove all
jewelry, makeup, etc. There is usually a woman attendant at the mikvah
to help the woman check that she is ready for the mikvah. During the
immersion, the woman makes sure that she is completely immersed
(including all hair). There are appropriate blessings said.
The woman then returns home, and informs her husband that she is now
in the tahora state. Marital relations are then permitted (in fact,
tradition dictates they occur that night). Biologically speaking, the
best night to conceive is usually mikvah night.
Note: The Torah also forbids relations on the day that a woman expects
her period, called her "veset". She knows when to expect her period by
keeping a careful record. Usually, a period of 30 or 31 days since the
first sighting of blood is used.
A vital factor of the Laws of Family Relations "tznius", or proper
attitude. Jews do not make jokes about private bedroom matters. A
woman's personal matters are nobody's business but hers, her husband's
when he needs to know, her doctor's, and her Rabbi's when and if the
rabbi needs to know. Women do not discuss these matters with others.
Some specific aspects of this are discussed at
[5]http://www.milknhoney.co.il/holy/19.html
Why does Judaism have niddah? These laws are Laws of Holiness, and
serve to elevate the physical to the highest spiritual level. It takes
a phyiscal aspect and adds holiness to it, allowing us to use the
physical for spiritual gain. As society has rediscovered the
importance of spirituality, these laws are being rediscovered, and are
even being adopted, to varying extents, by the progressive movements
in Judaism.
In Judaism, marital relations are a gift from G-d. They are neither
shunned nor avoided. However, they are not debased either. Rather,
Judaism provides a way to use sex to elevate us. By following Torah
laws, we develop the self-control and discipline that can lead us to
holiness. During the time that a man and woman are forbidden to have
relations they are forced to relate to each other in non-physical
ways. They must see each other in other terms, and develop their
relationship with each other on a spiritual and emotional footing. Is
this the reason G-d gave us this law. We cannot know. However,
understanding this effect often provides additional understanding for
following the law.
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Last Update March 27 2014 @ 02:11 PM
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