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I live with my boyfriend and we are intensely and passionate...

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Question by Bunnie
Submitted on 2/8/2005
Related FAQ: alt.polyamory Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)
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I live with my boyfriend and we are intensely and passionately in love with eachother. We posses all of the qualities that the other is looking for. There is one thing, he is polyamorous, and I'm not sure that I am.
In the beginning, when he told me about his beliefs on monogamy, he approached it in a way that involved me. He suggested that we try group sex, and that if this appealed to me, he could be satisfied with that. Well, we have attended one orgy and I believe that I have bisexual tendencies and could pursue this further.
Recently though, he confessed to me that this probably would not suffice and he says that in the future he will be sleeping with other women without me. We have the most incredible sex either of us have ever had, so I have a hard time accepting that he would want to have sex with anyone without me. It's devastating both of us. He wants to marry me and have kids with me, but occasionally have other women on the side, just to indulge. He can't come up with any explanation other than that men are just biologically programmed this way. He feels that if he is not free to do this, he will end up resenting me.
I am very torn. I love him more for being honest with me, but it doesn't make it any less painful. I would appreciate any advice on this.


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