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Archive-name: tv/mad-about-you/season5
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Last-modified: 97-02-05
Version: 5.3
Copyright: (c) 1994-1997 by Ramaswamy []

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Episode Guide for Season #5 of "Mad About You"
for the Usenet newsgroup


Archive-name: tv/mad-about-you/season5
Posting-frequency: monthly
Last-modified: 97-02-05
Version: 5.3


This Episode Guide for the TV Comedy show "Mad About You" is,
as a collection of information,
Copyright (c) 1994-1997 by Ramaswamy [].
All Rights Reserved.

This document may be freely distributed in electronic form for
personal use only, provided it is distributed in its entirety
and with all original author and copyright information intact.
Distribution by any other means must be by permission of the
copyright holder. This material is for non-commercial use only
and any sale for profit is expressly forbidden. It may not be
included in any commercial documents, archives or CD-ROMs, nor
uploaded to any BBS or online service without the permission
of the copyright holder. The removal of this copyright notice
is prohibited.


The MAY Episode Guides:

Episode Guide for Season #1
Episode Guide for Season #2
Episode Guide for Season #3
Episode Guide for Season #4
Episode Guide for Season #5


     The  Fifth  Season


Table of Contents

  Cast of Characters
  Supporting Characters
  The Production Team

  5.1  (501)   96-09-17   Dr. Wonderful [Season Opener]
  5.2  (502)   96-09-24   The Grant
  5.3  (503)   96-10-15   Therapy
  5.4  (506)   96-10-22   The Clip Show
  5.5  (507)   96-10-29   Burt's Building
  5.6  (504)   96-11-12   Jamie's Parents
  5.7  (508)   96-11-19   Outbreak
  5.8  (510)   96-11-26   Every Good Boy Deserves Fudge
  5.9  (505)   96-12-17   The Gym
  5.10 (509)   97-01-07   Chicken Man
  5.11 (511)   97-01-14   The Recital
  5.12 (512)   97-01-21   The Handyman


Cast of Characters

  Paul Buchman . . . . . . . . . . . .  Paul Reiser
  Jamie Buchman  . . . . . . . . . . .  Helen Hunt
  Lisa Stemple . . . . . . . . . . . .  Anne Ramsay
  Fran Devanow . . . . . . . . . . . .  Leila Kenzle
  Ira Buchman  . . . . . . . . . . . .  John Pankow
  Murray . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  Maui

Supporting Characters

  Burt Buchman, Paul's father  . . . .  Louis Zorich
  Sylvia Buchman, Paul's mother  . . .  Cynthia Harris
  Debbie, Paul's sister  . . . . . . .  Robin Bartlett
  Theresa Stemple, Jamie's mother  . .  Carol Burnett
  Gus Stemple, Jamie's father  . . . .  Carroll O'Connor
  Joan Golfinos, Debbie's girlfriend .  Suzie Plakson
  Ryan Devanow, Fran's son . . . . . .  Spencer Klein

  Lance Brockwell, Mayoral candidate .  Harry Groener
  Troy, Jamie's gopher at work . . . .  Patrick Bristow
  Vladimir, theonewordman  . . . . . .  Elya Baskin


5.1       Dr. Wonderful [Season Opener]

  With Mark Devanow in Europe, Jamie and Paul have to look around for
  a gynecologist and Debbie tries to set them up with her girlfriend.
  Meanwhile the elder Buchmans finally get to meet Debbie's friend.

  Written by:  Victor Levin and Larry Charles
  Directed by: Michael Lembeck
  Tag:         Sylvia and Burt talking to Debbie, about Joan.
  Expression:  "Get outta here!"
  Words:       Poetic, magical, sublime, good; Strapping.
  Keys:  Buzzing baby, pee-on-a-stick, Ira as Jose, debating 
         discussing or speculating, the woman thing, Dr. N-O-H
         (or Dr. Roh), Dr. Green too (not Anthony Edwards), Ira's
         long quest - girlfriend, bakery girl, finally the maid,
         bottom of the totem pole, the fish knife, casserole dish,
         garlic press and (silently) a whisk, exploring options, 
         Rhinebeck dishes, soy cheese and aspic, Joan of Oratory.
         The debut of Joan Golfinos.

  - Debbie: "So... only 96 hours, 15 minutes and 12 seconds
            until Mom and Dad finally meet Joan."
    Jamie:  "Relax. I'm sure the big news is that you've
            a girlfriend."
    Paul:   "Now you've given them a face to attach to the
            sleepless nights spent crying..."
    Debbie: "Thank you Paul. See how nice I am when you
            come out of the closet."
    Paul:   [uncertain, to Jamie] "What does she mean by that?"
  - Jamie:  "All right, you guys, what should we drink to?"
    Joan:   [to Debbie] "To your family!"
    Debbie: "My family... Dysfunctional, judgemental, intolerant,
            oppressive, petty and small."
    Paul:   "Yes, but we get everything when they die!"

  Supporting Cast:  Sylvia, Burt and Debbie.
  Guest Characters:
  Dr. Joan Golfinos  . . . . . . . .  Suzie Plakson
  Dr. Von Derphal  . . . . . . . . .  John O'Hurley
  Ira's girlfriend . . . . . . . . .  Victoria Hoffman
  Girl at the bakery . . . . . . . .  Jann Karam
  Consuela, Ira's maid . . . . . . .  Norma Maldonado

5.2       The Grant

  Jamie tries to stay awake, avoid coffee and continue to manage
  Brockwell's campaign. And while Paul is figuring out how to use
  a sizeable grant that has come his way, their uncle Phil asks
  Paul and Ira to visit him in Brooklyn.

  Written by:  Jenji Kohan, Victor Levin, Richard Day and Larry Charles
  Directed by: Michael Lembeck
  Tease:       Paul and Jamie doing the Macarena, or at least Jamie.
  Tag:         Uncle Phil rattling off the melons he's got.
  Expression:  "Got Milk?"
  Word:        Sifting.
  Keys:  Eating for 2 (or 3), sound bites or sound gulps, Berkus
         in Albany, the wow kiss (coffee, not cajun), looking for
         Kinko's, talking of Java Men, etimology of stupid, Colombian
         drug lords at Java Hut, moving the Eagle couch, Foim embrace
         all around, Tom Brokaw as a blur, the intrusive peach, cleft
         or cliff, a legal pad and 2 sharp Eberhardt #2s.
         The debut of Troy and Vladimir, and the second Lance Brockwell.

  - Paul:  "We even have Yah-tzee?"
    Jamie: "Yes, we've Yah-tzee! It's right under here."
    Paul:  "Okay, a little yah-... You *would* *not* believe
           the stories he was telling me - we had this welterweight
           in our family, this guy who was a fighter in the Thirties,
           apparently like, not that great, but he... I mean, like
           all these people... What a great idea for a movie! It's
           like... my family! Just... Buchmans! That's the name of
           the film. You know, over the years, how the Buchmans
           came to this country and converged and scattered and
           then coursed through the veins of America... to me
           that's a great movie, don't you think?"

  Guest Characters:
  Uncle Phil . . . . . . . . . . . .  Mel Brooks
  Lance Brockwell  . . . . . . . . .  Harry Groener
  Troy, Jamie's gopher . . . . . . .  Patrick Bristow
  Brockwell's speechwriter . . . . .  Gedde Watanabe
  Jamie's co-worker  . . . . . . . .  Arnetia Walker
  Vladimir, theonewordman  . . . . .  Elya Baskin
  A Campaign worker (blue shirt) . .  John Freeland Jr.
  Kinko's customer . . . . . . . . .  Nick Toth
  A Reporter . . . . . . . . . . . .  Deborah Guyer Greene

5.3        Therapy

  Months after setting it up, Jamie and Paul decide to keep their
  appointment with the therapist Fran referred them to, but doing
  so delays Paul's shoot of his parents' reminiscences, with some
  interesting consequences.

  Written by:  Richard Day
  Directed by: Michael Lembeck
  Tag:         The therapist dictating her take on the Buchmans.
  Word:        Bibliotheque.
  Keys:  Loving Abbott and hating Costello, the barking disapproval,
         reversal of selves, hearing a tone, the Prozac connection,
         the Equal moment, a bottle-fed baby, marbled pot-roast at
         Emilio's, facing down the other Costello, and finally --
         a reckoning.

  - Jamie: "I like it, I think it is unique."
    Paul:  "Unique is not the same thing as good."
    Jamie: "You hate it?"
    Paul:  "Not to the point of barking at it, but I don't like it!"
  - Jamie: "I called the therapist today and told her
           we weren't coming back."
    Paul:  "That's good... isn't it?"
    Jamie: "I guess... it was stupid to go, right?"
    Paul:  "Well, nah... it wasn't stupid. You didn't know!"

  Supporting Cast:  Sylvia, Burt, Lance, Troy and Vladimir.
  Guest Characters:
  Herb Buchman . . . . . . . . . . .  Alan Charof
  The therapist (Sheila) . . . . . .  Mo Gaffney
  Paul's cameraman . . . . . . . . .  Kenny Moskow

5.4        The Clip Show

  Having chosen the residents of Apartment 11-D as its parents, the
  baby in the making deals with musical interludes and parental cooing,
  and with lots and lots of choice moments from their years together.
  In other words, a clip show.

  Written by:  Jonathan Leigh Solomon and Leslie Caveny
  Directed by: Michael Lembeck
  Retrospective Sequences by: Chuck Workman
  Words:       Her and him.
  Keys:  Whats and wows, kisses and looks, chanting and warbling,
         entrances and more entrances, Warren and Ursula, Y. Ono
         and Christie, Lisa and Sylvia, slaps and spits, Fran and
         Mark, Mark and Fran, Ira on generations, Murray in life,
         dancing and giddyap to the future, First Trimester movement.

  - Jamie: "Tell you what was a big hit -- the sound-track
           of "Guys and Dolls!"
    Paul:  "Really?"
    Jamie: "See, her daddy loves show-tunes. I thought
           she ought to know!"
    Paul:  "Well, thank you! Did you play him your Hungarian Chants?"
    Jamie: "Bulgarian."
    Paul:  "Whatever."
    Jamie: "Yes."
    Paul:  "And?"
    Jamie: "Loved it."
    Paul:  "Really?"
    Jamie: "Yes."
    Paul:  "How do you know?"
    Jamie: "Because I'm the mommy! I can tell."

5.5        Burt's Building

  Filming of Paul's documentary takes him and Burt back for the day
  to their old apartment building, and events conspire to make Paul
  late for an appointment at Joan's office to hear the baby's
  heart-beat for the first time.

  Written by:  Ron Darian, Victor Levin and Larry Charles
  Directed by: Michael Lembeck
  Tag:         The Sounds of Paulie.
  Expressions: "At this point, yes!" and "I'm your *father*."
  Keys:  Hold button and switch-hooks, call waiting, the 5:00PM
         appointment, combinations of 435-45 Pelham Parkway,
         wrought iron railings and stoops, Hitchcock's cameraman
         (who can field-strip an Uzi), a story in flashback with
         an arc and a structure, 4-D or 4-E, olives and monikers,
         Fallout Shelter sign, The Fugitive search after a
         little stroll, Trudy's Soda Fountain, Tom Brokaw's early
         Evening News, 5-pack of Bazooka gum, Rusty the cocker spaniel,
         the growth door, the 10 to 39 spurt, and the first heartbeat.

  - Joan:  "Is he here yet?"
    Jamie: "Not yet. Is there anything else you can do?"
    Joan:  "Well, I've seen all my patients, finished all my
           correspondence, alphabetized my files... I'm thinking of
           taking up painting!"
    Jamie: "I'm sorry! I'm going to *kill* him!"
    Joan:  "Well, then you couldn't yell at him, what with
           him being dead and all."
  - Burt:  "Don't you think I know which one is the hold button
           and which one is the switch-hooks?"
    Paul:  "I.. I know it. I thought you did, I knew that!"
    Burt:  "I was just done talking to you, that's all."
    Paul:  "Which.. which I know now, I understand."

  Supporting Cast:  Burt and Joan.
  Guest Characters:
  Akiba, Paul's cameraman . . . . .  Christopher Darga
  Osofsky . . . . . . . . . . . . .  Allan Corduner
  Paul, as a youngster  . . . . . .  Adam Weisman
  Irwin, storekeeper in 1964  . . .  Zane Lansky
  Howard, storekeeper in 1996 . . .  Markus Redmond
  Artie Zeitlin, the neighbor . . .  Floyd Levine

5.6        Jamie's Parents

  The Stemples arrive at Paul and Jamie's apartment for a 2-day visit
  with a surprise, and another soon follows. And Lisa makes her first
  appearance of the season.

  Written by:  Maria Semple
  Directed by: Michael Lembeck
  Tease:       Paul dealing with Jamie's reaction to the sight
                 and smell of food.
  Tag:         Theresa helping Gus locate some Tums.
  Keys:  Shopping with Thelma and Louise, Tang and Swiss Miss,
         shoplifting arrest, powdered beer or candy corn for Poppy,
         Da Noise Da Funk, mother jumper (no swearing), separate
         entrances, the Stemple buzzing code, sports, politics and
         the stock market (Pittsburgh, Perot and IBM), table assembly,
         dinner ding and plates over the heads, a 37-year marriage,
         interesting mildew patterns, a long talk at the Jets game
         (another loss), a short talk back home.
         Appearance of the third pair of actors playing the Stemples.

  - Jamie: [the door-bell buzzes and she bumps into furniture]
           "Aaaow! Fu.." [starts singing] "..or crying out loud!"
    Paul:  [approvingly] "For the baby?"
    Jamie: "Yes, for the baby!" [shouts at the door] "COMING!"
    Paul:  [hurrying after her] "Oh, oh, tell me again with
           your mother because I blew it the last time... when
           she says something is bad, that means it is good?"
    Jamie: "No, no, no! When she says it is good, it is bad."
    Paul:  "Good is bad."
    Jamie: "Good is bad, like is loathe, love is hate.
           When are you going to get this?"
    Paul:  "I got it, I got it. So when is it actually good?"
    Jamie: "Nobody knows." [she opens the door]

  Guest Characters:
  Theresa Stemple . . . . . . . . .  Carol Burnett
  Gus Stemple . . . . . . . . . . .  Carroll O'Connor 

5.7        Outbreak

  The Buchmans decide on the time and place of their grand announcement
  but the leaks start early this Thanksgiving week, at the elevator.
  The pace is fast and furious and the saga ends with a surprising
  connection. And Fran makes her first appearance of the season.

  Written by:  Richard Day
  Directed by: David Steinberg
  Tease:       Jamie clueing Paul in, puzzle-wise.
  Tag:         Monkeys in Africa figuring out how they heard the news.
  Keys:  The glow one can read by, the first telling, 4 steps from
         Marlon Brando, the Mickey Rourke bomb, a Thanksgiving Day
         date, third-degree under lights, Sanford's secret, Slotkin's
         dry scalp, Arturo's mousse, Theresa's scream, Debbie's pie,
         the poker game, non-picture of non-grandson, a $100 bribe,
         the gathering, the Conways' friends, and Burt's hurt look.
         Place and Time of Day captions throughout, "Outbreak" style.

  - Arturo: [to Paul] "You see this mousse? You put this in,
            it disappears, no one knows you wear it, makes you look
            handsome, no one knows WHY!"
  - Ira:    "Paulie, would you just give it up? This is like a virus,
            this information is spreading all over the place! You know,
            there's a monkey in Africa that knows you're pregnant."
    [a bit later]
    Debbie: "Two things -- 1) Congratulations, Paulie, this is
            wonderful news. I'm so happy I could cry, 2) You're a
            son-of-a-bitch!" [she leaves the apartment]
    Paul:   "Hey, Deb..."
    Maggie: [regards him from the doorway] "What have you
            done to your hair?"
    Paul:   "I'm so tired of you." [closes the door]

  Supporting Cast:  Burt, Sylvia, Debbie, Joan, Theresa and Maggie.
  Guest Characters:
  Woman in the elevator . . . . . .  Joanna Daniels
  Arturo, hairdresser to many . . .  Jose Zuniga
  WDED-FM disc jockey . . . . . . .  Carol Rosenthal
  Campanella, the proud grandpa . .  Ralph Manza
  Mel Slotkin . . . . . . . . . . .  Alex Rocco
  As himself  . . . . . . . . . . .  Kevin Bacon

5.8        Every Good Boy Deserves Fudge

  While Ira counsels against it, Paul contemplates abstinence until
  July; however Jamie has other ideas and talks Paul into a trip
  upstate where they chance upon a dessert item with magical powers.

  Written by:  Victor Levin
  Directed by: David Steinberg
  Tease:       Paul explaining Baseball to the baby.
  Tag:         Murray fudging his way to a starry-eyed state.
  Keys:  The fragile Jamie, Ira's experience, Paul's adventure, the
         Jack Palance push-ups, baby Leon's yard, reaction to a kiss,
         last time alone, funky parents, the Estrogen therapy, the
         calm Paulie, Gruber's Country Store goodies, the surprise
         back at 11-D, crooked picture, mallomars a poor substitute.

  - Jamie: "You're not going to break anything."
    Paul:  "How do you know?"
    Jamie: "Because I know, I asked, I read, the fact is
           having sex is good for me."
    Paul:  "Really?"
    Jamie: "Yes! It allays anxiety, it fights cramps,
           it builds muscle-tone and it's aerobic."
    Paul:  "When done properly, yes."
  - Jamie: [entering the store] "Well, now I'm only starving."
    Paul:  "All right, let's get you something to eat."
    Jamie: "This place is great, isn't it great?"
    Paul:  [holding up a prop] "Hey! Get me! I'm Eddie Albert!"
    Jamie: "I see pitchforks, I see birdhouses, I see
           shaving mugs, I see no food at all."

  Supporting Cast:  Sylvia, Burt and Maggie.
  Guest Character:
  Mrs. Gruber . . . . . . . . . . .  Dorothy Patterson

5.9        The Gym

  Paul so likes playing the Mystery Man at a local gym that he talks
  Jamie out of working out there, whereupon she hands over her free
  pass to a homeless acquaintance from the neighborhood.

  Written by:  Victor Levin, Richard Day and Larry Charles
  Directed by: Michael Lembeck
  Tease:       Making hot fudge sundae in the middle of the night.
  Tag:         Dreaming about the Mystery Man.
  Word:        Discerning.
  Keys:  Books-A-Plenty closing Weatherby's, some contradictory
         recommendations, 10-visit free pass to the oasis, being
         nobody's anything, untowering Inferno, lacrosse shoes,
         two guys in bad shape, no 2-syllable words, vegan bookseller,
         the pass for "Ask the Dust," Ira's proposition at the
         library, Jamie's confrontation at the gym.

  - Jamie: "What do you think about this?"
    Paul:  "Oh, I'm so happy not to be in this conversation!"
    Jamie: "Yeah, well..."
    Paul:  "I think it is.. y'know, it is one of those
           situations where truly there are no winners."
    Jamie: "Wow, could you be more wishy-washy?"

  Guest Characters:
  Virgil  . . . . . . . . . . . . .  Bruno Kirby
  Dante . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  Paul Parducci
  Virgil's friend . . . . . . . . .  John Toles-Bey
  Italian customer at the gym . . .  Alfonso de Rose
  Gym clerk . . . . . . . . . . . .  Elizabeth Larou
  Clerk at Books-A-Plenty . . . . .  Karen Gracey

5.10        Chicken Man

  Jamie finally lets her co-workers and Lance know about the baby,
  while Ira, turning money man and producer for "Buchman," actually
  manages to produce a narrator, at least in voice.

  Written by:  Jonathan Leigh Solomon, Ron Darian and Larry Charles
  Directed by: David Steinberg
  Tease:       Huh-ing for attention.
  Tag:         Water-tasting for discrimination.
  Keys:  Fatter and fatter for 9 months, tug-o-zipper, out of
         the closet, entirely delectable, La Guardia's niece,
         courting Ed Koch, a little tear, non-oily Vittel,
         Lisa's corrupting influence: A is for apple, B for
         Boyfriend, C for Condom, reading at kindergarten
         level, traffic ticket from the baby, Sit! Stay!

  - Ira:  "Actors, yeah!"
    Paul: "No! [slaps him] Producers!"

  Supporting Cast:  Lance Brockwell, Troy and Joan.
  Guest Characters:
  Molly Norman  . . . . . . . . . .  Kari Coleman
  Cackling auditioner . . . . . . .  Roger Behr
  High pitched auditioner . . . . .  Danny Breen
  The Chicken Man . . . . . . . . .  Ron Darian
  Campaign worker . . . . . . . . .  Jeanne Mori
  In His Own Voice  . . . . . . . .  James Earl Jones

5.11        The Recital

  A politically incorrect Jamie pays the price for commenting about
  Ryan's ability as a budding violinist, while a simmering Paul works
  up the nerve to confront the therapist about her over-charging ways.  

  Written by:  Moses Port, David Guarascio, Jenji Kohan and
                 Maria Semple
  Directed by: David Steinberg
  Tease:       On the feeling of stealing that extra bow.
  Tag:         On humming "Turkey in the Straw."
  Words:       Bunko, prefunctory.
  Keys:  Cancelling the thing, $80 an hour, or a hundred, near-sighted
         with rage, Biiiiig Man, the deal with apologies, a butcher
         with stubby little hands, Buchman's Sporting Goods Players,
         therapy on Tuesdays, perhaps more alone, How does the violin
         sound? at $120 an hour.

  - Jamie: "So you do now admit that Fran was not in the least
           bit insulted, so your advice was completely wrong and
           there was no need to apologize."
    Paul:  "I do now admit that."
    Jamie: "Why does that give me no satisfaction?"
    Paul:  "Because.. thanks to me, you are in a heap o' trouble?"

  Supporting Cast:  Ryan Devanow.
  Guest Characters:
  Sheila, the therapist . . . . . .  Mo Gaffney
  Marvin, the store-clerk . . . . .  Jeff Garlin

5.12        The Handyman

  The perils of engaging Paul and Jamie's handyman are visited upon
  Lisa, whose fiance Sanford is more than willing to finance Paul's
  now over-budget documentary project.

  Written by:  Richard Day
  Directed by: David Steinberg
  Tease:       About Paul's song, very catchy, too catchy.
  Words:       Beholden, finessement.
  Expression:  "Singing for my supper"
  Keys:  The wrapped-up house, a $9000 rainout, the very vocal
         refrigerator, digital editing bay, urinal ice, Faust
         of the Chargers, the announcement and the seizure,
         Grant in the tub, drain-plug leverage, and the talk.

  - Lisa: "Where *is* she?"
    Paul: "Ah, uh, in the incinerator room, I'll go look."
    Lisa: "I need to talk to my sister!"
    Paul: "I know, I know you do. Your sister and no one
           else will do."
    Lisa: "Will you talk to me until she gets here?"

  Guest Characters:
  Doug, the handyman . . . . . . . .  Scott Atkinson
  Sanford Klarik, Lisa's fiance  . .  Billy Morrissette
  Zigmund Klarik, his father . . . .  Ed Asner
  Security agent . . . . . . . . . .  Vasili Bogazianos


The Production Team

  Created by:             Paul Reiser and Danny Jacobson
  Executive Producers:    Larry Charles, Paul Reiser, Danny Jacobson
  Co-Executive Producer:  Richard Day
  Supervising Producer:   Victor Levin
  Producers:              Bob Heath, Helen Hunt, Craig Knizek,
                          Jenji Kohan, Maria Semple
  Coordinating Producer:  Mary Connelly
  Associate Producers:    David Craig, Geof Addison
  Script Supervisor:      Victoria Weisbart
  Production Coordinator: Linda Demeduk
  Costumes:               Howard A. Sussman and Maureen Gates
  Art Direction:          Robert Strohmaier
  Photography:            Bobby Byrne
  Editing:                Sheila Amos
  Sound Mixing:           Peter Damski

  Writers:   Leslie Caveny, Larry Charles, Ron Darian, Richard Day,
             David Guarascio, Jenji Kohan, Victor Levin, Moses Port,
             Paul Reiser, Maria Semple and Jonathan Leigh Solomon.

  Directors: Michael Lembeck and David Steinberg.


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