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[] Sarah Michelle Gellar FAQ

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Archive-name: personalities/sarah-michelle-gellar
Posting-Frequency: monthly
Last-modified: 30 December 2002
Copyright: (c) 1999-2003 Jamie Cheetham
Maintainer: Jamie Cheetham <>

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Frequently Asked Questions

Section 1 - Sarah Michelle Gellar
Section 2 - Newsgroups
Section 3 - AFSMG


Section 1: Sarah Michelle Gellar

1. Who is Sarah Michelle Gellar
 Eh? I dunno....

2. Where can I get pictures/sounds/etc of Sarah?
 On the world wide web, via email, on usenet, in magazines, on posters, from the TV, etc. Goto
for an extensive list of most SMG sites.

3. Does anyone know when Cruel Intensions came out in the UK?
 It was cinemas everywhere from 18th June 1999, Rated 15. For realease dates in other countries, see

4. Is Sarah a brown belt in Tae Kwan Do?
 Sources lead us to believe that she is.

5. Where does Sarah live?
 Earth, Sol System

6. When is Sarah's birthday?
 14th April 1977

7. Are you Sarah?
 I don't think so...

8. Is Sarah personally involved in the development of any part of Softham Enterprises and/or My Realm?

9. What is Sarah's postal address?
 We don't know, she is probably trying to keep it private, but you can send her fan mail to the address below:

Sarah Michelle Gellar

C/o Buffy the Vampire Slayer

C/o The Warner Brothers Television Network

4000 Warner Blvd

Burbank, CA 91522

10. Does Sarah read all her fan mail personally?
 She used to read all her mail and send back a personalized autographed picture and sometimes, a hand written letter, but she just doesn't have time to read all of her mail and respond to everyone now.

11. Will I get something back if I write to her?
 Most people that send mail to the studio said they got sent back a 4x7 pre-printed autographed picture of Sarah from the WB studio fan mail department.

12. A couple of years ago, a birthday card was sent to Sarah from AFSMG. Was there any reply?
 This post made by Mike Sivier answers the question:

"It seems very clear to me, now, that the card was received by that department, opened by one of its drones, scanned for a return address, and the pic sent off without any thought for its content.

... Especially since I included a little letter saying this had been a group effort by lots of us so it would by pointless sending a signed pic back.

There's no kind of personal touch as even the signature is printed on. I can only conclude that if any of YOU want SMG to read any mail you may choose to send her, you should avoid the studio address at all costs. Someone did mention this to me, unfortunately after I'd sent the card, but now I have visual proof of the truth of their words."

13. Who is Sarah's agent?
 Sarah is managed by Booh Schut and repped by ICM agent JoAnne Colonna and attorney Deborah Klein.

Booh Schut Agency

11350 Ventura Blvd. #206

Studio City, CA 91604


14. Where can I get some of Sarah's DNA to clone her with?
 I'm not telling you !

15. What is Sarah's home telephone number/e-mail address?
 I don't know, please don't ask me. If you want to get in touch with her, write to her at the studio. Anyway, she would want to keep it private.

16. Has Sarah ever posed nude?
 No, so do NOT bother asking !

17. Will Sarah ever pose nude?
 It has been suggested that she would consider posing nude when pregnant.

18. Have you ever met Sarah?

19. Do you want to meet Sarah?
 Yes. D'uh. :-)

20. What films has SMG been in?
 Check out,%20Sarah%20Michelle.

21. I heard that Sarah is dead. Is it true?

22. How long has Sarah been acting?
 Sarah has been acting for 21 years. She started when she was 4.

23. Is Sarah a lesbian? I saw a picture of her kissing a girl!
 The picture you saw came from one of Sarah's movie entitled Cruel Intentions. The role called for a kissing scene with another girl, Selma Blair.
The key word is role, and does not mean anything about her personally.

24. Does Sarah have any tattoos?
 She has three tattoos. One is the Chinese symbol for integrity on the small of her back, one is a heart & dagger on the inside of her right ankle and the other is a Celtic symbol on her left hip.

25. What colour are Sarah's eyes?

26. Where was Sarah born?
 New York City, USA, to parents Rosellen and Arthur Gellar.

27. Who does Sarah's hair?
 I don't know.

28. What are Sarah's favourite things?
 Colour:                   Red

Food:                     Pasta

Movie:                    Heathers or The Princess Bride

TV Show:               Seinfeld or Party of Five

Actors:                   Tom Cruise, Daniel Day-Lewis

Actress:                  Stockard Channing

Season:                  Summer

Vacation Spot:       Bermuda

Book:                      Gone With the Wind

Hobbies:                 Ice Skating, Scuba Diving, Shopping

Sports:                   Ice Skating, Football

Sports Team:           New York Giants

Piece of Clothing:   Motorcycle Jacket

Music:                     Billy Joel

Section 2: Newsgroups

1. What is a newsgroup?
 An area on Usenet, devoted to the discussion of a specified topic. Usenet is a distributed bulletin board system and the people who post and read articles thereon. Network News Transfer Protocol (NNTP) is a protocol used to transfer news articles between a news server and a news reader.

2. How to I access newsgroups?
 Use a news-client such as Outlook Express in Windows or SLRN in Linux. See the applications documentation for further details.

3. Am I allowed to post binary files?
 Not to You should upload them to the web, then post the URL to the newgroup. If you do post a binary file there, you will be flamed.

  To quote Godfather:   "Many use a newsreader for offline browsing the idea being to save them time online which, in the UK where many members originate, costs money. This newsreader downloads all new posts to the group from the server and we subscribe to this group
because we enjoy the discussion, not to download binaries that should not appear in the group. There is a designated group for this to happen - alt.binaries.sarah-m-gellar - and that is where binaries should be posted."

4. What are binary files?
 Binary files are any files that aren't "normal" text, e.g. Pictures, sounds, movies, ZIPS, etc.  They are often larger than text files, and are sometimes removed by certain ISP from posts at as it is a non-binary newsgroup.

5. I heard there are many bad influences on usenet, is this true?

6. Can we use smileys?
 Yes, we like smileys :)

7. Am I allowed to spam people on this newsgroup?
 No, spamming is a sin !

8. What is spam?
 Noun: Spam

1. (trademark) a tinned luncheon meat made largely from pork

2. Unsolicited e-mail sent in bulk to many different people

9. What is a troll?
 A troll is either someone who spams the group continuously, someone who annoys the rest of the group, continuously posts crap, etc.

10. If a troll comes, what do I do?
 Simply ignore them. Also try and contact their ISP to report them. Alternatively, be nice and pleasant and kind - that often annoys them. :-) Don't feed the trolls. The following third-party URL gives further information

11. What are these ICQ numbers I see in some people's sigs?

"ICQ ('I Seek You') is a revolutionary; user-friendly Internet program that notifies you who?s online at all times and enables you to initiate contact with those people at any time. No longer will you search in vain for friends or associates on the Internet. ICQ does the searching for you alerting you in real time when they sign on." from the ICQ help file.

12. When I reply to a post, should I put my message at the top or bottom?
 In my honest opinion if you reply at the top it makes it more confusing to see what exactly the person is replying to. In long posts especially, the poster might want to reply to points throughout the previous post. What's to be done then? If the entire reply is written above the post, how are we to know to what point(s) the poster is replying?

Most people reply at the bottom anyway, and a few odd people replying at the top isn't that important. Just don't start demanding that everyone should always reply to the top, or you will be flamed.

13. What is a "flame" which you keep mentioning?
 To rant, to speak or write incessantly and/or rabidly on some relatively uninteresting subject or with a patently ridiculous attitude or with hostility towards a particular person or group of people. "Flame" is used as a verb ("Don't flame me for this, but..."), a flame is a single flaming message, and "flamage" /flay'm*j/ the content. Flamage may occur in any medium (e.g. spoken, electronic mail, Usenet news, World-Wide Web).

14. Can I post messages here in HTML?
 You can, but I strongly suggest that you don't. Not everyone can read HTML messages and it increases the download time. Also, I won't be very happy.

15. What is snipping?
 Removing an irrelevant part of a post and replacing it with <snip> or <snipped> or nothing at all. Unless you are commenting on someone's sig, you should snip that.

16. Can can swear as much as I want?
 Yes, but please put *s in the words, e.g. cr*p, sh*t, f*ck and b*gger. This is because younger people visit the ng and be offended by it, or just start repeating it to their parents. Anyway, you don't f*cking well need to f*cking swear in every f*cking post you make. :) Even though kids are going to hear (and use) the words like that anyway, we don't want to get blamed for it. Also, there are some people who are a bit sensitive about it.

17. If I'm really angry, can I miss out the *s?
 Yes, but you should include about 20 lines of "swear space" at the start of the post so that people who are offended by it don't see it.

18. Can I ever miss out the *s in the subject line?
 No, all subjects lines must always be censored.

19. Did you hear about....?
 Spreading rumors is never a good idea. It can get you killfiled, flamed by hundreds of people, and kicked off mailing lists and more importantly, people may nuke you. If you have a piece of news to tell us, try to back it up by giving the URL of a website containing more information about it.

20. What is killfiling?
 It is a way of blocking posts of certain people so that you don't have to download them. It is sometimes also know as the "Blocked Senders List".
This is useful for putting spammers and trolls in.

21. How do I killfile someone?
 Have you tried RTFM*? It is unlikely that the term "killfile" would be used. Instead look for how to block the sender, or filter out posts by a certain author. For an advanced filtering solution for Windows news clients, have a look at

* Reading The F*cking Manual

22. What is spoiler space?
 A large gap (at least 15 - 20 lines) with a warning. It is for separating stuff you know from stuff we don't. Most people haven't seen the Buffy episodes that haven't been on BBC2 yet, so make sure that use spoiler space when you want to discuss them. Also, if commenting on a new film, don't talk about the end without using spoiler space or you will spoil it for other people.

23. People keep telling me to FOAD, what does this mean?
 It means that we think you suck and you should f*ck off and die.

24. When people post something in capital letters, what does this mean?
 It usually means that they are shouting, but this does not apply to acronyms.

25. What is the maximum number of lines that I can use for a sig?
 There is no set maximum at the moment, but remember that the bigger it is, the slower this newgroup will become... I recommend no more than 4 or 5 lines.

26. Am I allowed to post off-topic material?
 Usually, but please add [OT] to the start of the subject line.

27. Can I advertise my web site on this newgroup?
 Yes, but only if it is relavent to the newsgroup. In sigs though, you can advertise whatever you want.

28. What is Goodwin's Law of Usenet?
 Professor Goodwin, in 1981, made the observation that Usenet discussions gravitate downhill. See for further information.
Section 3: AFSMG

1. Why do you sometimes allow off-topic posts?
 Off-topic posts help keep people interested in the group in times when there is little news about Sarah.

2. What is AFSMG?
 The society of people who post and/or lurk at, which is a Usenet newsgroup for the discussion of topics related to Sarah Michelle Gellar.

3. Do I need a special membership to join AFSMG?
 No, some people have interpreted our alternate brand of humour and some of our comments/jokes the wrong way, and assumed we don't want new people, or new people have to be selected or something. We don't mind new people. The only limitation is we don't want hundreds of new people, so the message count goes up too high. If you are a regular though, you can go on the People Profiles.

4. What is the charter of
 The Sarah Michelle Gellar newsgroup is a place of public discussion for Sarah Michelle Gellar. Since this group is not located under the binary hiearchy, binaries should not be posted. Advertisements of any sort are not permitted.

5. When I first join AFSMG, what should I do?
 Lurk for a bit and just read the posts. After that, post a message saying hello and tell us a bit about yourself. You may be asked if you need any sort of pills.

"We are insane.

Lower your head and surrender your pills.

We will add your social and financial information to our site.

Your fridge will adapt to service us."

6. What can I discuss on
 Any of these:

Electrical appliances (including HV transmission & distribution systems), Friends, Music in general, Buffy being cut, The Simpsons, Sarah's boyfriend, Cruel Intentions, Lesbian kissing, If Sarah is a lesbian, Acronyms, Anagrams, OE5, Netscape, Freeserve, Microsoft, AOL, Deja, Web sites, Newbies, Sarcasm, Jokes, Chat-up lines, Girls, Free Agent, The Great British Take-Over :), Winamp skins, IRC, Warner Bros., Programs, The FAQ, Small Soldiers, Sarah's e-mail address, Birthday cards, Christmas cards, Public 
addresses, Buffy, Exams, Pills, HTML, free ISP connections, Linux, Usenet, etc.

But none of these:

Parts of SMG's body which I had no part in, Naked photos, Fake naked photos, How wonderful and kind the BBC is, Whistles, Britney Spears' boob job, Ali G, Sybil Danning etc.

7. When was created?
 The creation was filed and discussed in alt.config in July 1998 for two weeks and I *think* it was actually created on Monday, 3rd August 1998. I, Jamie Cheetham, aka Linux Jay, have been here since about December 1998.

8. Where be the nudie piccies of Sarah?
 There aren't any real ones, so do NOT bother asking.

9. Where be the fake nudie piccies?
 Try DO NOT ask for them on the newsgroup! We do not object to nudity itself, we just don't want fakes, or even links to fakes in the group. There's something very disrespectful about "revealing" someone against their wishes.

10. What is this newgroup supposed to be about?
 Sarah Michelle Gellar, but often we talk about electrical appliances (including mircowaves and computers).

11. What happens if Sarah actually comes here?
 We would welcome her, lots of times, but not so many we spam her, then we would probably just burst. :)

(Be careful though, it may just be someone impersonating her!)

12. What does FAQ stand for?
 Frequently Asked Questions, although some of the questions on this page have never been asked...

13. What does SMG actually mean?
 Check out

14. Can I message along the lines of "If anyone here loves Sarah, give me a whistle"?
 NO !!

15. Are the people at this newgroup normal?
 It depends what you mean by normal...

16. Who rules AFSMG?
 The British, but I personally rule the FAQ, the acronym collection, the birthday list, the People Profiles, and various other stuff.

17. I want some nude pictures of Sarah, will you send me some?

18. What is "Slayers - The Blood Is The Life"?
 This short story is based freely upon "Buffy The Vampire Slayer"-series. Buffy has moved on to college, but is still slaying vampires. A new slayer has taken her place at the Sunnydale High School. It was written by Carsten, aka No Humor Man.

19. Who are the regulars members of AFSMG?
 Linux Jay

No Humor Man

Mark Sumner

Martin Wright

Windoze Ed

How B'zza



Al Dobyns


Timber Wolf

Mistress Ellie

The order above doesn't matter, other than the fact that the first person on the list (Linux Jay) is the one who manages the FAQ.

20. Where can I find more information about the regulars?

21. Where can I find people's birthdays?

22. I don't understand what Enix is talking about, why not?
 Enix is completely crazy, possibly insane.

Note: Enix has not been seen for a long time, so I've declared him dead.

23. What does <enix /> mean?
 If you ever get totally confused and can't understand a post at all, just say <enix />. It could also mean "WTFRUON?"  or something. Enix's name got used because it usually involves his posts in some way or another... :)

Note: The old version was <Enix>, but it has been changed to <enix /> to comply with XML.

24. Did you write all of this FAQ yourself?
 No, I wrote most of it though, but I would like to thank several people from AFSMG for contributing bits of it.

25. So who are you?
 I have many names, including:

The Spoon Guy

Herbert's 42nd Christmas Pie

Jamie Cheetham

Kieran Cheetham

Linux Jay

Wonko The Sane

Species 8473

26. What does *bing* mean?
 The sound that some people members of AFSMG make when they killfile someone. *plonk* is a variant on this. <bing> and <plonk> can also be used.

27. I'm a lesbian, will I be welcome in AFSMG?
 Yes! The group is for all people who like Sarah M Gellar, not just males. Any homophobic comments made by trolls should be ignored, though they are liable to be flamed.

28. I'm a member of SETI@home, is there a SETI team for members of AFSMG?
 Yes there is, have a look at

29. Do you allow erotic fan fiction to be written for the group?
 We have nothing against R or NC-17 rated fanfics as long as they deal with the characters of the story and not the actors and actresses playing the roles.  Doing a fic with real people doing sexual acts or the like is not only immoral by the author, but also commiting libel against said person(s) used and could ultimately damage their carreers, etc. Also, we try to keep this a family group, so give a warning before posting or linking to anything which may be unsuitable for children.


If you have any comments, suggestion, or hate-mail concerning this FAQ, please email me
at jamie at

This FAQ may be posted to any USENET newsgroup, on-line service, web site, or BBS as long
as it is posted in its entirety and includes this copyright statement.

This FAQ may be distributed as class material in machine-readable form (ie: diskette, CD-ROM,
etc.) as long as there is no charge (except to cover materials).

This FAQ may NOT be included in commercial collections or compilations, or distributed for
financial gain, without express written permission from the author.

This FAQ is provided as is without any express or implied warranties. While some effort has
been taken to ensure the accuracy of the information contained in this article, the author
assumes no responsibility for errors or omissions, or for deaths, destruction of the Earth
or other damage resulting from the use of the information contained within.

Copyright  1999-2003 by Jamie Cheetham, all rights reserved.
Last modified: 30th December 2002

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